Child Inclusive Mediation
Whilst children are not directly involved in their parents’ mediation, they can often be indirectly involved in the decision-making process.
Child Arrangement Orders
We are able to offer Child Inclusive Mediation with accredited and specially trained Mediators. If it is appropriate the Mediator can see each child separately from their parents in a private and confidential meeting. If the child or children are very young or do not, themselves, want to be seen, the Mediator will always make sure that thought and time is given in the mediation sessions to how they might feel about the arrangements being proposed. Our in-house psychoherapist can also explore with parents what their own feelings might be about the arrangements under discussion and help the adults to communicate with their child(ren) in ways that enable the child(ren) to feel listened to and heard.
For Child Inclusive Mediation to take place the child(ren) should be over the age of 10 years, unless they have older siblings, in which case they can be seen both as a sibling group and individually. Both the parents and the child(ren) must consent, and the child(ren) can be seen in person or virtually. The meeting is arranged in a neutral setting, often the child(ren)’s school.
The parents are also helped to prepare before the meeting. They are each asked to commit to not ‘coaching’ the child(ren) in any way and must be aware that they may not hear feedback from the meeting if the child does not agree to this, or that they may hear feedback they do not welcome or expect.
The main purpose of this private and confidential meeting is a well-being one: to check in on the child(ren) and see how they are doing. There is no agenda. If the child(ren) want something fed back to their parents, then this is carefully agreed with them. No written report is made and the feedback to the parents is given verbally.
The Benefits of Child Inclusive Mediation
Parents who agree to their child(ren) being seen in this way are not putting them in a difficult position or putting unwelcome pressure on them: quite the reverse. Research* shows that just being asked how you are feeling following changes at home, by a neutral person who is helping your parents, aids a child’s short and longer-term development. It can also have the effect of improving things at home if it allows the child’s needs and perspective to become more centre stage for their parents.
*Mooney, Oliver and Smith: ‘Impact of Family Breakdown on Children’s Well-Being’, (June 2009), Thomas Coram Research Unit.
Get in touch now
enquiries@themediationspace.co.uk
5th Floor, 30-31 Furnival Street
London EC4A 1JQ